What a Pain!

James 1:2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

Yeah right! I think I am at about six weeks now of sciatica pain. If you have not experienced it, count your blessings. I think it’s the worst pain I have ever experienced. It’s in and out, sometimes you think, hey I’m having a pretty good day and then you stub your shoe on the ground or lift your leg just wrong and it almost brings you to your knees! The worst part is trying to sleep, I am unable to sleep in a bed, I don’t know why, I don’t know what part of that position is triggering the intense pain, but I do know that it sucks! I’ve slept in a recliner since the second day, and that is less than ideal.

Worse than the pain is the inability to do the things around the house that need to be done, and being fairly helpless. I am not a sitter, I like to be outdoors and working in the yard or mountain biking or something, anything. Antsy is an understatement!

Even worse? The waiting! When is this going to clear up, what is the right thing to do and how much movement is too much? Will this ever get better?

I am an upbeat person generally, but I have found myself looking into depression, and hopelessness. It’s scary. I remember when Sharon’s dad had sinus surgery. No big thing right? However, he dove into a deep, deep depression that seemed unreal. Dad was the most upbeat person I have ever met, he was amazing that way. Nex level optimist, happy-go-lucky kind of guy. Probably I shouldn’t even call myself upbeat in the same paragraph he is mentioned in!!! In the back of my mind, if a relatively easy operation like that can affect him, if my back doesn’t get better and soon, what does that mean for me?

About the time this started my son, his wife, and their 4 kids moved in with us. No coincidence, I over did it helping them get their house on the market and sold. The last thing I wanted my grandkids to see is me moping around the house doing nothing, no biking, playing around… Even sitting on my lap can be a problem. Not how I envisioned this going! Also, my son has a huge project on his next house and I am sidelined.

What I am realizing is that there is still something I can do. I can try and model someone who deals with adversity in a positive and constructive way. Who knows what they will face in the future? Do they need to learn this now because of something coming down the road? In this world who can know anything for sure, it’s very uncertain and scary.

Consider it pure joy… What does that even mean? Are we supposed to jump up and down and relish our sufferings? I don’t think so. I think we are supposed to profit from our sufferings, squeeze everything we can out of them and emerge on the other side somehow different and hopefully better for it. In the middle of our sufferings we are suffering! Period! I think James is telling us we have the choice to suffer WITH purpose or WITHOUT. If we suffer with purpose the joy will come because we will not only get relief on the other side of suffering, but we will be better for it. If we choose to suffer WITHOUT purpose, we might get relief but that is it.

What happens if we don’t get relief? Like Paul, what happens if the thorn in our side never goes away? There is neither relief or joy, this is not a good outcome.

James 1:2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

Yeah right! I think I am at about six weeks now of sciatica pain. If you have not experienced it, count your blessings. I think it’s the worst pain I have ever experienced. It’s in and out, sometimes you think, hey I’m having a pretty good day and then you stub your shoe on the ground or lift your leg just wrong and it almost brings you to your knees! The worst part is trying to sleep, I am unable to sleep in a bed, I don’t know why, I don’t know what part of that position is triggering the intense pain, but I do know that it sucks! I’ve slept in a recliner since the second day, and that is less than ideal.

Worse than the pain is the inability to do the things around the house that need to be done, and being fairly helpless. I am not a sitter, I like to be outdoors and working in the yard or mountain biking or something, anything. Antsy is an understatement!

Even worse? The waiting! When is this going to clear up, what is the right thing to do and how much movement is too much? Will this ever get better?

I am an upbeat person generally, but I have found myself looking into depression, and hopelessness. It’s scary. I remember when Sharon’s dad had sinus surgery. No big thing right? However, he dove into a deep, deep depression that seemed unreal. Dad was the most upbeat person I have ever met, he was amazing that way. Nex level optimist, happy-go-lucky kind of guy. Probably I shouldn’t even call myself upbeat in the same paragraph he is mentioned in!!! In the back of my mind, if a relatively easy operation like that can affect him, if my back doesn’t get better and soon, what does that mean for me?

About the time this started my son, his wife, and their 4 kids moved in with us. No coincidence, I over did it helping them get their house on the market and sold. The last thing I wanted my grandkids to see is me moping around the house doing nothing, no biking, playing around… Even sitting on my lap can be a problem. Not how I envisioned this going! Also, my son has a huge project on his next house and I am sidelined.

What I am realizing is that there is still something I can do. I can try and model someone who deals with adversity in a positive and constructive way. Who knows what they will face in the future? Do they need to learn this now because of something coming down the road? In this world who can know anything for sure, it’s very uncertain and scary.

Consider it pure joy… What does that even mean? Are we supposed to jump up and down and relish our sufferings? I don’t think so. I think we are supposed to profit from our sufferings, squeeze everything we can out of them and emerge on the other side somehow different and hopefully better for it. In the middle of our sufferings we are suffering! Period! I think James is telling us we have the choice to suffer WITH purpose or WITHOUT. If we suffer with purpose the joy will come because we will not only get relief on the other side of suffering, but we will be better for it. If we choose to suffer WITHOUT purpose, we might get relief but that is it.

What happens if we don’t get relief? Like Paul, what happens if the thorn in our side never goes away? There is neither relief or joy, this is not a good outcome.